The Toodles continues with the presentation of the second award.
(Opening Ceremonies, First Award)
YELLOW DOG GRANNY
Yellowdog Granny has lived through many adventures and incarnations. She might be sober now, but I imagine her past life as being able to outdrink, outcurse, and out armwrestle pirates and Hell's Angels. She's been an outlaw and a housewife; she's had spicy affairs and been on the lam; she is a bookworm; she is a blogging political activist wielding her razor sharp tongue to champion the underdog. And she is mother and grandmother, of course.
She is like a character in a book or a movie. I believe Granny could staredown John Wayne in a high noon stand-off. I fully expect Yellowdog Granny to get involved in some intrigue or grand affair and have Sally Field portray her in the movie version. Her delightful reports of life in West, Texas remind me of a character in one of my favourite books, FRIED GREEN TOMATOES, and soothe my soul in these troubled times. The fact that she is from Texas and fervently anti-Bush only further increases my respect for her and my hope for our country. If I am not this awesome in twenty years, smack my ass and feed me some Dublin Dr Pepper and Bluebell Ice Cream.
I hereby bestow the Hootanahollernanny Toodle to the Hot Damnedest Rockin' Granny in Texas, The United States of America, and the whole world!!!
Fuck me til I get to West, Texas!
(The applause and shouting is deafening! The audience is searching for a glimpse of the reclusive granny! Amidst the showering of bouquets and the clapping of hands you can hear the murmuring: "What will she say? When will she appear? Will some of her magic reach me, here in the 22nd row?")
RANDOLPH SCOTT CONGRATULATES MS JACKIESUE ON HER TOODLE AWARD!!!
TOODLE ON!!!
8 comments:
YaaY...she'll kick their arse...can't wait to read her acceptance speech.
frig i'm in the 23rd row...better get the rocket launcher to sling me panties at the stage for this one...i'm also thinking i better buy more panties.
oh man..my head reels..such an honor...be still my fucking heart...and couldnt have put anyones pictures up that i adore more than janice and ole randolph..im working on my speech now...thanks toodler..you the bomb
That was a great speach on jackiesue. You have described her in an excellent way.
She and Babs are the two best things to EVER come out of Texas! Congratulations to Jackiesue! How did I manage to get 3rd row seats???
*spies a kafuffle in the third row*
*smirks at the little scientology freak and his incubator of a girlfriend*
i hate to come in second in anything..but trust me...mojo could have.drank(drunk??) me under the table..and as we both will attest...that ain't necessarily a good thing..ha...
Yeah Jackiesue!!! You make me proud to be a Texan!!
JACKIESUE! JACKIESUE! oh hell, this name hollering crap is getting stale...
PERFECT description of Ms. JS, though! :-)
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